As true at this moment as it was five long years of the poet’s hell ago, when it was first written.

Our recording this dawn is accompanied by the ever-vigilant roosters of Ascension Ranch.

*****

Recorded Reading (2:42): https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/15o3mgj266aq1tndhcezm/before-i-light-this-candle.mp3?rlkey=z47hd0hsw73ksdt8tuvokm8sh&dl=0

*****

before i light this candle

before i come
before i go

before i stand up
before i sit down

before i speak
or remain silent

before i smile
or nod

so much as murmur understanding
i ask

ask
with all my heart

do i really
wish to do this thing?

is it me
myself who wishes to do it

or is it something i do
only for the acceptance of others

only to gather in
semidemihemismiles of vapid approval

for fear
fear of something

even
worse?

and if it is i
i indeed

who wishes
to act

why is it
that i wish it?

is it only for me
my own selfish little self?

would it perhaps come
at the expense of another

or
does it benefit the whole

all
of us?

and then
i ask also

how much
do i wish it?

if a butterfly’s wing
moving languidly, once

can stir typhoon winds
far away

might it behoove me to consider
these potential consequences?

i ask
i ask

ask
a thousand

thousand times a day
and every

every
every time

there comes a clear and
beautiful answer

*****

This poet presently lives at a fraction of her nation’s poverty level.

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