*****

Recorded Reading (5:06): https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/00bhucn70wd39we7x5k30/caught.mp3?rlkey=2j8ff1sivr3lnf70ufxi0djcj&dl=0

*****

caught

in the sucking grip
of ego

not really your fault
everyone points to it
for “success”

your tv
your radio
your FaceLook

all of them
point
unceasingly
to
ego

now you’re
stuck

all of your attention
is on your own face
all your interest
caught
in your own gestures
mannerisms
tones

the question

is my character developing
in the direction
of he whom i admire

has been replaced
in our spirits

by the question

do i look
like that ad

act
like that sitcom

outshine
my best friend
in the eyes
of people i don’t care about

no longer is it
am i worthy

now it’s
am i
hot

caught

stuck

your attention riveted
not by your-self
you despise that

no

it’s all
about
your mask

how…
uncomfortable!

how boring

mundane

unnatural

how it blocks you
from rejoicing
in the beauty around you

always asking
am i more
beautiful than that

no magic can reach you
past your busy
calculations of
appearance

playing petty
parlor games
in the drab anterooms
of all the sparkling
palaces of the universe…

when you’re ready
good and ready
sick to your stomach
of inhabiting the barren sterile
loveless friendless lands
to which you are brought back by ego
again and again

and again

in an
endless
feedback
loop
of increasingly
jaded
disillusionment

there is
a way out

you say you
want to know
what it is?

naaah.

you’re just curious
ready to curl that
jaded lip

like the young lord
in that one movie
(did you do it right?)

no, you say

you’re ready

ready for something real
an unguarded moment
free
to rejoice
in all the gifts that grace
your every single day

lost in love

among people
who are capable
of love also

not cruising
like so many baracudas
waiting for
one mili-moment
of graceless
unscripted
fatal
indecision

you’re ready

to run
with the wind
barefoot

happy

free

well
okay
i’ll give it to you
then we’ll see

whether you mean
what you say
or are just posing
some more

here it is…

sure you’re ready?

listen, then:

for one
moment

forget
about
your
false
self

get

really
truly
genuinely
completely

interested

in the person
across from you

that’s
the whole
thing

inanutshell

*****

Until removal of the stalker/targeter/vandal/arsonist following her allows her to approach any landlord ~ even for a private parking space ~ and to begin once again to create professional connections and to rebuild her life, this poet presently lives homeless and at a fraction of her nation’s poverty level ~ still working seven days a week to contribute to her society, however.

Arts patrons may visit http://www.UgiftABLE.com , using code #72D-31S, or choose to send a personal check to the poet’s ABLE account. It takes about two weeks for the poet to be notified of your patronage.

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