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Recorded Reading (3:25): https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/3togncr0hw3c0mw7p7xj2/New-World-University.mp3?rlkey=73577c87ky5fwoi220a4kxx6s&dl=0

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New World University

Greetings ~ I’m your Study Guide for this semester, and I’ll keep this introduction short, since I know none of you would be here unless you were passionate about your chosen fields of study, and you’re all rarin’ to go!

I know you’re all happy you weren’t students here one hundred years ago. You would have undergone all kinds of contractual contortions to get yourselves locked in to “classes” conducted on rigid communal schedule ~ all locked up in the same airless room under artificial lights day after day, half asleep while I’d be droning on arbitrarily about things you found relevant to your passions, but just as often things that you didn’t…

What a lot of pedants that system turned out! Their greatest reward ~ other than money, of course, nearly all of which had to be spent maintaining their status among coevals ~ continued, sometimes for life, to be the subjection of others to all the sarcasm, clever belittlement and deadly boredom they themselves had to endure!

Oh, when I think of the memorization of eminently accessible rote fact for the pleasure of crabbed examiners at ordeals called “tests” upon which hinged the entirety of a hapless pupil’s future professional (and, in those dark days, financial) fate!

… So, yes ~ a little snippet of history, there, which will make your guided months of free study in our various learning environments all the more precious to you. You should see all your horrified expressions right now! Hahaha!!

Well, getting down to business, there’s a page on our site which outlines all of the indoor and outdoor study areas, all, of course, network connected. Some of my personal favorites are the Fishtank Room and, outdoors, the Sylvan Grotto, but that’s just me! Others find Steampunk Hall conducive to concentration, and who am I to question their effective methods, right?

Okay, also there’s a page of resources ~ of course, the basics, like connections to all the world’s libraries and ways to access individual items from their collections ~ millions upon millions of them! ~ as well as lists of consultants available for more advanced specialist guidance.

There are quite a few of those as well! There’s an alphabetical drop down menu to get you going, and after that you can click on any name within a specialty to get particulars on what they have to offer… At last count, this university employs over 25,000 part time teachers!

And you all know I’m pretty much on call for general steerage through the shoals and quicksands of dreaded academia, right? In fact, we can start with all that right now ~ if anyone’s got a question they think everyone else might be interested in, anything not covered on the site…?

Okay, well I’ll be right over by the fountain for anybody who’s got something of a more individual nature. Just hit me up.

A-a-a-a-nd I guess that’s it! Big, scary Orientation! All done! Enjoy the refreshments, get to know one another, and ~ we’ll be seeing you around campus!

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This poet is physically disabled. Public housing being insufficient to her medical and creative needs, she is presently living, in order to continue working, in her minivan, publishing all of her works using one thumb on the touch screen of her smartphone, surviving at an income of a fraction of her nation’s poverty level. She would treasure any donation you might care to offer ~ http://www.UgiftABLE.com ● #72D-31S.

Please be aware that it takes several days for the poet to be notified of contributions. International patrons please contact the poet via email or post a comment for the necessary numbers.

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